Discussion:Urban Tax Legends
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| + | {{ForumReplyPost|UserID=Vickytown|Date=18 February 2008|Text=140. From my own father: I cannot believe someone my age has to pay taxes!}} | ||
Revision as of 21:13, 18 February 2008
Discussion Forum Index --> Tax Questions --> Urban Tax Legends
| 8 August 2007 | |
| OK Folks, let's list our favorite Urban Tax Legends.
I'll start:
2) Using the pre-printed IRS label increases your audit risk. 3) Filing late in the filing season near April 15 decreased your audit risk. 4) Filing an extension and filing near Oct 15 decreases your audit risk. 5) Taxpayers over age 65 who are still working don't have to pay Social Security tax. 6) The Amish don't pay income tax. 7) Nurses/police/EMTs on call can deduct the cost of their monthly phone bill since they need to have a phone to keep their job. 8) Firefighters can deduct the cost of their lunch since they are on duty 24 hours a shift. 9) If you show you owe at least $1 instead of getting a refund, you are less likely to be audited. 10) There is a Slavery Reparation tax credit for African Americans who never received their '40 acres and a mule'. 11) You can deduct the cost of your car and all its operating expenses (or mileage) as a business expense if you put advertising on the car. 12) You can deduct the cost of your vacation if you go on a job interview (keep that business card of the interviewer) while away.
| |
| 8 August 2007 | |
| 13) There are loopholes to benefit the rich which your tax professional doesn't even know.
14) I only have to claim the income for which I received a 1099. 15) I can deduct a gift of up to $12,000 given to my daughter. 16) Police officers can deduct $5 a day as Walking Around Money (WAM). 17) I can deduct the cost of keeping my dog as a security system, and the cost of my pet parakeet as "aereal surveilance". 18) Because the IRS didn't audit me, the deduction I have been taking all these years must be legal. 19) Taxing labor/services is unconstitutional. | |
| 8 August 2007 | |
| 20) Attorneys can deduct their cable bill because Court TV is educational. | |
| 8 August 2007 | |
| 22) You can incorporate your business in Nevada and pay no state income taxes, even though the corporation does business in your home state and other states.
23) Filing on extension and claiming a large refund increases your audit risk. 24) The Internet Tax Fairness Act forbids states from imposing sales or use taxes on goods ordered over the internet and shipped from outside the buyer's state. 25) Newly arrived legal immigrants or refugees get a seven-year federal income tax holiday. | |
| 8 August 2007 | |
| 26) "Only the little people pay taxes." - Leona Helmsley, Federal Inmate | |
| 8 August 2007 | |
| 27) The federal income tax is unconstitutional because the 16th Amendment was never properly ratified by the states.
28) The federal income tax is voluntary and applies only to those who volunteer to pay it. | |
| August 8, 2007 | |
| 30. Claiming an office in the home increases your audit risk.
31. S corp owners don't have to claim a salary. 32. You can claim your live in girlfriend as a dependent. 33. Someone has to win the Irish Lottery. | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
34. Showing $495 as a non cash donation has less audit risk than showing $500.
35. Most IRS agents/officers are mean and hard to deal with. 36. When a client calls and says "I have a quick question", it does not need a quick answer. | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 9 August 2007 |
| 37. Beatle Fred consumated his transaction.
38. If you make a lot of money in one year, they got this special thing called income averaging. 39. My buddy claims his dog as an exemption (or anything beginning with 'My buddy' | |
| August 9, 2007 | |
| 41. Going to a competent tax preparer will lower your taxes. See Discussion:Do_taxpayers_prefer_incompetent_tax_preparers? | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 42. Put down "Whatever the IRS Allows" for charitable contributions.
43. I didn't collect any money on my sale and reinvestment of mutual fund shares. Also, I invested $ 3,000, and redeemed $ 3,000. | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 44. You're only liable for the actual tax due on your return if you file as married filing separate, even in a community property state. | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 45. If you don't agree with the tax laws you don't have to go to jail even if a jury finds you guilty and the judge hands down a sentence. You can stay in your compound and go neiner neiner neiner and everything will be OK. | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 9 August 2007 |
| 46. Keyzer Soze doesn't pay taxes, why should I? | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 47. Criminals (i.e. drug dealers, etc.) are not required to pay taxes on their illegal business income. | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 48. Putting it on the corporate credit card automatically makes it deductible.
49. It's the accountant's job to figure out how to write that off. 50. If I don't file my return, I don't owe any tax. 51. My tax at year end is determined by how I fill out my W-4. | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 52. If I'm prosecuted for tax fraud, a jury would be sympathetic, because they don't like to pay taxes either (as opposed to being mad at me because they pay their taxes).
Great discussion! | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 53. I don't have to include early withdraws from 401K/IRA because I already paid the tax (since 20% was witheld by the financial institution). | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 54. I had tax withheld, I do not have to file a tax return. See State of Wisconsin and Rollie Fingers (yes, the relief pitcher). | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 55. If I go to one of those "pennies on the dollar" places, I will only owe them and the government "pennies on the dollar." | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 9 August 2007 |
| Check out Neil Buchanan's "Dishonest Tax Rhetoric" in yesterday's Tax Prof Blog: http://taxprof.typepad.com/
56. Why can't I deduct my F-150, I carry my tools to work every day? | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 57) My dad left me his IRA, savings bonds, tax-deferred annuity, and installment sale note as my inheritance. Inheritances are tax free because he didn't leave over $2 million. | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 58) I can deduct the cost of dad's funeral.
59) We can take a deduction on dad's tax return, or the estate tax return, for the clothes we donated to goodwill after dad died. | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 9 August 2007 |
| 60. She's got custody but I give her $500 a month for support of the three kids. I know I can't deduct child support but I can claim them, right?
61. I can use the government's per diem rates to figure out of town expenses for me and my clients, right? [this one is sad, because I see it asked here so often] 62. The realtor said all these settlement expenses on my new residence are deductible. 63. It must be deductible!! I read it in a post somewhere on TaxAlmanac! | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 64. I sold the farm I inherited from dad 60 years ago. I have two years to reinvest the money and not pay tax, right? | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 65) "I don't pay taxes. I got a refund."
66) "Why is my fee so high? I did all the hard work, all you had to do is put it in your software." "I even sorted my receipts by month and gave you a separate envelope for each month with all the receipts in them. It's all there - office supplies, meals, gas, cell phone, advertising purchased in January is in the January envelope. Everything purchased in February is in the February envelope..." 67) "What do you mean it's wrong? I used Quickbooks and Turbo Tax. It HAS to be right!" 68) "Mom gave me her house when it was worth $200,000. I sold it for $195,000 after realtor fees. I can deduct the loss right? 69) I sold a vacant lot to my friend for $20,000. He only paid me $2,000, so I took it back. The tax appraiser says it is now worth $28,000. I can deduct the loss the $18,000 I never got from my friend, right? | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 71) My return is easy, it'll only take you about 5 minutues to do.
72) I don't have to claim the cash I received, only the checks. (Good thread idea Kevin) | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 73) "I'm making mortgage payments on a house. That makes me Head of Household". | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 74) "My neighbor got a bigger refund than I did. You don't know what you are doing." | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 9 August 2007 |
| 75 What do you mean, it's an OINK? | |
Chautauqua (talk|edits) said: | 9 August 2007 |
| 76) "You can deduct as a charitable contribution the value of any time you devote to charitable work. The IRS will not accept an hourly rate as high as, say, $20, but if you use $10 to $12 you are OK." | |
TheTinCook (talk|edits) said: | 9 August 2007 |
| 77)"What do you mean I can't deduct that contribution?! The charity said I could" (Client does not have enough itemized deductions to make itemizing worth while.) | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| 77. I can deduct the cost of a boat as entertainment if I take my clients out on it, right?
78. I sold my property and I want to do a 1031 exchange. Can you help me figure out how to do it. (after closing...) | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 9 August 2007 |
Hey Wayne, the other version of #78 is "but I used all the money to buy another one later so I could avoid paying tax." This is a variant on
| |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| I can see it now, in future threads we will no longer have to use words like "oink", we will just write "52" , "48", or "78" and everyone in on the joke will toss their hair back and laugh and laugh. | |
| 9 August 2007 | |
| speaking of which, when a cow laughs, does milk come out of her nose? | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 9 August 2007 |
| There is a subtle difference between 43 and 79. In the former, Mr. Sure I Am Right only sees himself breaking even and sometimes doesn't even know he has suffered a loss. In the latter, however, he insists nothing has to be reported. Make it a hair-breadth.
btw, Kevin, you are borrowing from the old story about how men in prison tell jokes, shouting out numbers. "49" "Hah, hah, hah." Another voice shouts 23 and more laughter ensues. Then Mr. Newby asks his cellmate what is going on and learns that all the men know the jokes by numbers, so he yells '28' but no one laughs. Punchline: 'Some people just don't know how to tell a joke.' | |
Chautauqua (talk|edits) said: | 9 August 2007 |
| D&T-
Or the Newby shouts out a number, absolutely slays the crowd because they had never heard it before. | |
Donniecastleman (talk|edits) said: | 9 August 2007 |
| 79. Why do I have to keep my receipts for my Schedule C business deductions? Can't I just claim the standard deduction instead?
80. We pay for everything, even our groceries and personal mortgage, through our corporation to make it all deductible. We've always done it that way. | |
Donniecastleman (talk|edits) said: | 9 August 2007 |
| 81. My refund was higher last year! You suck! | |
| 10 August 2007 | |
| 82. Social Security is never taxable. You don't even need to put it in the computer.... | |
| 10 August 2007 | |
| 83. It says here that municipal interest is not reportable - therefore I don't have to give you that. | |
| 10 August 2007 | |
| 84. Here's my 1000 Schedule D transactions from the broker - you don't have to do many calculations - they give you the net gain/loss. | |
| 10 August 2007 | |
| 86. Breast implants increase my income as a waitress at Hooters, accordingly, they are deductible. Can I section 179 them or must I deduct them over my life expectancy as a structural improvement? | |
Donniecastleman (talk|edits) said: | 10 August 2007 |
| Hey DZ, scout's honor, I work in a country rock band at Hooter's Casino in Vegas, and I NEVER have seen a pair of silicons walking around in there, so they wouldn't be deductible anyway, don't need 'em to work there, haha. | |
| 10 August 2007 | |
| One comment on #86 - when I was still in school, my professor read us a tax case where a stripper argued over the deductibility of breast implants. If I recall correctly she was able to depreciate them as a business expense because they allowed here to earn more money. | |
| 10 August 2007 | |
| 87. Since my child lived with me, my mom, my aunt, my cousin, my neighbor, and my grandmother at some point last year we all qualify for head of household. | |
| 10 August 2007 | |
| Cmt56ss is correct about allowing the deduction BUT the reason was not simply because she could earn more money. The case involved a stripper named Cynthia Hess. In the Tax Court, Judge Pate allowed the deduction but ONLY because she came to the conclusion that there was NO element of personal enhancement in this case.
In an "ordinary" enhancement, a stripper might be able to make more money but the enhancement also brings personal (not business) use. Much like a tooth whitening - not deductible even if it helps the taxpayer in a work situation. You use your teeth on a daily personal basis. BUT, in Ms. Hess's case, she was enhanced to a 56FF size. The Judge felt this was SO FAR from the norm, it was ONLY done for business reasons. | |
| 10 August 2007 | |
| 88 what do you mean I need a qualified appraisal to take $15k of clothing deductions I've been doing that for years. true quote. | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 10 August 2007 |
| 89. I got audited once. Went in there and dumped a bag of receipts on his desk, saying "Here's your proof, Mutha!" He took one look, told me to get out of there, and said there would be no change. | |
Mtmckeecpa (talk|edits) said: | 10 August 2007 |
| 90. Cash basis service provider: "I can write-off that bad debt, right?" | |
| 11 August 2007 | |
| 91. My neighbor's tax guy is deducting all his personal expenses on his return. (I've always wanted to meet "my neighbor's tax guy." Apparently, he is smarter than all of us).
93. I can deduct all the cost of my kid's college education on my return. 94. I had medical expenses this year. They are deductible, right? 95. I bought some tax preparation software this year because the commercials told me you aren't getting me all the deductions I am entitled to. Can I deduct that? | |
Actionbsns (talk|edits) said: | 11 August 2007 |
| 96. I'm planning to talk "off the record" with the RO so I don't have to pay all of my tax liability at once, he'll understand that I have other bills, right?
97. I have to look good to be successful in my career so my jewelry, home furnishings, clothes, car, cat, dog, shoes, dry cleaning, make up, - all of it's deductible, right. 98. But I had a really cool sign made up for my car, so now it's advertising because everywhere I go, I'm advertising my business. That makes it entirely an advertising expense doesn't it. | |
| 11 August 2007 | |
| 99. My wife (who's an employee of my corporation) had dinner with me to discuss business. That's a deductible entertainment expense, isn't it?
100. I went on a business trip this year and needed needed by buy new luggage. | |
| 16 August 2007 | |
| 102. There is a large Hmong presence in Appleton, WI and the story goes ... that they get all kinds of free benefits and don't have to pay taxes for 5 years after immigrating to the US. | |
| 16 August 2007 | |
| check out 25 - if they had been legal immigrants they would have gotten 2 extra years tax free! | |
| 16 August 2007 | |
| 103. If you hire those tax relief firms that advertise on cable TV, you can "settle your tax debt for pennies on the dollar". | |
| 16 August 2007 | |
| Steve, does 102 pennies on the dollar, or 112 on the dollar count? LOL. | |
Chautauqua (talk|edits) said: | 17 August 2007 |
| What is this crazy talk about "pennies"? We haven't used pennies in this country since the Revolutionary War. We use "cents". | |
| 17 August 2007 | |
| 105 - Once you have a corporation everything is a business expense, and I mean everything! | |
| 17 August 2007 | |
| 106 - Tax accountants are only busy during "busy season". Tell that to the Mrs. | |
Actionbsns (talk|edits) said: | 18 August 2007 |
| 107 - This is Hawaii - we don't do it that way. | |
| 18 August 2007 | |
| Uhhh, 107 isn't an Urban Legend! Unfortunately, it's too often true. | |
| 18 August 2007 | |
| 108- "I'm a Revenue Officer. You don't need a tax professional to help you. Just deal with me. I'll take care of everything". | |
| 18 August 2007 | |
| 109. Contributions "I don't know" what did I give last year? | |
| 18 August 2007 | |
| 110. Isn't that $ 1,000 check to My Favorite Vet a medical deduction? | |
Actionbsns (talk|edits) said: | 18 August 2007 |
| Steve - don't jump on board with #107, it's frustrating enough to hear it around here. Hawaii is still part of the rest of the world. We really are NOT a unique little place with its own set of rules. Although, there is a movement to re-create that. | |
| 18 August 2007 | |
| Yes, but I have often taught in different parts of the country and they say "we don't do that here" or "we don't apply that law here - it is stupid" or some other such nonsense. Like they can pick and choose which laws to apply. | |
| 18 August 2007 | |
| My point exactly. There are many Hawaiians, especially some of the Native Hawaiians that believe the tax laws don't apply to them. In addition, Hawaii has long been home to many strange tax schemes unseen anywhere else. I've had several clients with scenarios that were definitely unique to Hawaii. | |
| 19 August 2007 | |
| 111) I'd rather give it to charity than give it to the IRS. As if every dollar of contribuions saves a dollar in tax. | |
| 19 August 2007 | |
| Damn Kevin...aren't charitable contributions credits? My church told me I could credit my tax for the value of the contributions I made....can I have my stock back now? hehehehehe | |
| 22 August 2007 | |
| Update on #26, the Queen of Mean is dead. Leona Helmsley
I had forgotten that she had several employees do her judge ordered community service work. | |
| 24 August 2007 | |
| Re 111 - on the other hand, it's OK in my book when the statement is I'd rather give it to you (the tax preparer), than the IRS. | |
| August 24, 2007 | |
| 113. Who cares if the bank sends me a stupid 1099 for the cancellation of my debt. I got a huge loss I can deduct from the sale of my residence. | |
Bottom Line (talk|edits) said: | 25 August 2007 |
| 114. What do you mean I have to pay tax on cancellation of debt for not paying off my credit card? I didn't get anything for it! (No, nothing. Just meals, clothes, jewelry, vacations, gasoline...) | |
| 25 August 2007 | |
| 115 It's not fair!!! The credit card company cancelled $25,000 worth of my debt and now I have to pay taxes on money they never got! | |
| 25 August 2007 | |
| http://www.taxalmanac.org/index.php/Discussion:Sec._179_depreciation_and_Car_Wash_Purchase
116. Loan repayments and drawings from my company are deductible expenses. I am sooooo tired of having to explain....... | |
Bottom Line (talk|edits) said: | 25 August 2007 |
| 117. I couldn't have made all that money! I don't have that much in the bank! | |
| February 1, 2008 | |
| Good job, Kevin - this will be fun. I'll read last year's when I have time (June?).
118) One of my favorites: Principal on a loan is deductible, right? Whadda ya mean, it's NOT. | |
Bottom Line (talk|edits) said: | 1 February 2008 |
| But the money came out of my checking account!! | |
Actionbsns (talk|edits) said: | 1 February 2008 |
| 119) This one just yesterday - we just got married and our taxes are now sooo complicated, can I write of my work clothes?, can we write off gas my husband used for work (did I tell them to buy that great big truck?), you mean my homeowner's dues aren't deductible? | |
| 1 February 2008 | |
| 120) How about the tax rebates?? Someone told me the other day to be sure to include his rebate when I file his return. | |
Rgtaxservice (talk|edits) said: | 1 February 2008 |
| Somebody's got to start numbering these. Might as well be me.
Not really a myth, but tax questions I get called about from non-clients. 121. "I'm doing my own taxes. Can I come to your office to get forms?" | |
| 1 February 2008 | |
| I had #42 last evening, even after the mailer went out explicitly stating documentation is required, in bold print.
To add to #62, The car dealership who prepared my taxes last year deducted it. | |
| 1 February 2008 | |
| 122: I have to pay taxes on my state refund? That's double taxation! | |
| 1 February 2008 | |
| 123: $300 per return! I thought you said $300 for all five returns! | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 1 February 2008 |
| 124 Do you have PEOPLE here?
125 Where's the Turkish Bath? | |
| 1 February 2008 | |
| 126. Actually had a client bury several tips to the pizza guy in with charitable donations. | |
| 1 February 2008 | |
| 122. One prospect new client held up the 1099-G with the state tax refund on it and shoved it in my face and said very angrily.."Here is the new face of RAPE". Needless to say I didn't take him on...I got my hands full without taking on someone who wants to get angry with me and argue about the unfairness of his taxes...give me a break. | |
Rgtaxservice (talk|edits) said: | 2 February 2008 |
| 123. All mail received that reads Important Information Enclosed must be a tax document.
124. Let the 'tax man' open said mail. Years ago I had a client that received an Important Information envelope during the year. He gave it to at tax time unopened. It was a policy cancellation notice from his insurance company. | |
| 2 February 2008 | |
| 125. I fully depreciated my truck. Then I gave it to charity, and they said I can deduct the fair market value. | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 7 February 2008 |
| 126, though I am sure this is in the verbiage above, but we have our first 2008 sighting of
"I thought they were taking taxes out all year and now they give me this 1099 Form. Paystubs? Who keeps or looks at paystubs?" It is sort of like the swallows returning to Capistrano, or the first robin or 'pitchers and catchers reported for Spring training. | |
| 7 February 2008 | |
| 127. That bad debt expense? "The guy never paid me for the work I did". | |
| 7 February 2008 | |
| 128. You don't need to worry about sending me a form 1099-Misc - I already filed my tax return. | |
| 7 February 2008 | |
| 129. "There's gotta be something I get for working for myself!" | |
| February 7, 2008 | |
| 130. "I can't file my taxes until I get my 1099-miscs to find out how much money I took in." | |
| February 7, 2008 | |
| 131. "I think I'll go to JH, they say they will get me more in return." | |
| 15 February 2008 | |
| 132. Someone told me if I worked for two employers, I could report one W-2 this year and the other one next year. | |
| 15 February 2008 | |
| variation on 127: I was out sick 3 weeks last year and didn't get paid. I can deduct that, right? | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 15 February 2008 |
| and the other 127 variation, 'Lost Rents' when the place was vacant. | |
| February 15, 2008 | |
| 133. I'm over the FICA limit from my other employer, so my corp doesn't have to withhold or pay the FICA tax on wages paid to me. | |
| 15 February 2008 | |
| 134. If the IRS issues a levy, they report it in the newspaper. | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 15 February 2008 |
| 135. Didja deduct the 401K | |
| 15 February 2008 | |
| 136. Can I claim the kids half the year and my ex claim them the other half? | |
| 15 February 2008 | |
| 137. Just came in........"My wife got a job. Here are the bills for the new clothes she bought." | |
| February 16, 2008 | |
| RE: #134 - this was a simple mistake on my part and does not belong on this discussion. | |
Death&Taxes (talk|edits) said: | 16 February 2008 |
| 138. No, don't put my Social Security number on the check; those thieves at IRS may steal my identity.
Come to think of it, is this really a legend or does it contain a kernel of truth? | |
| 18 February 2008 | |
| 139. I did my return myslef, can you check it. It won't take any time... | |
| 18 February 2008 | |
| 140. From my own father: I cannot believe someone my age has to pay taxes! | |


